Monthly Archives: July 2014

Very Inspirational Blogger Award – The 411

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very-inspirational-blogger-award

Spiritbabycomehome nominated the Plan-B-Chronicles Blog for the VERY INSPIRATIONAL BLOG AWARD !!  How awesome is that?  I am so humbled and honored. 

In accepting this recognition, I must do the following 5 things, which shall be done in this post (as I would not want to keep you waiting):

1.  Thank and link the amazing person who nominated you. 

  • Done (above)

2.  List the rules and display the award.

  • You’re soaking in it!

3.  Share seven facts about yourself. 

  • I studied pre-law at Howard University.
  •  I sang in a gospel choir called YAFE under the direction of Grammy Award Winning Gospel Mistro, Richard Smallwood for 10 years.
  • I am a published author.
  •  I am a film producer, actress, model, screenwriter, and vocalist.
  • I am a voice-over actor and my voice is the intro on City World Radio
  •  I have a niece who looks like she could be my twin.
  • I want to move to Vancouver or Europe eventually .

4.  Nominate 15 other amazing blogs and comment on their posts to let them know they have been nominated.

5.  Proudly display the award logo on your blog and follow the blogger who nominated you. (Optional)

  • Done (above).

Zero Zero Zero !! – The 411

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baby - zero

I went in for beta testing this a.m and the nurse called me at 11:30 am to inform me that my beta is now  ZERO !!  I was fully expecting it to be five since it has been dropping only by one every week for the past three weeks.   Well, color me surprised when the nurse said ZERO !!

Never been so happy over the prospect of the onset of menses before in my life !  Really?  Only an IVF patient would be praising God for a period about to start LOL.

Now, I shall wait for AF to show her ugly face.  I am just hoping she doesn’t show up and cause scheduling conflicts with my upcoming film premiere on the 16th.  It would be my luck that I would have to go to Albany the week of my premiere for ER and then have to come to DC for the premiere and then trek back 7 hours to Albany for ET.  It is my prayer that my cycle holds off a week or two and then I can stim thru the premiere, trigger then leave for Albany. I also have a wedding to attend on the 23rd in Niagara Falls so, that would be perfect if I can be done prior to all of this…

 

 

Beta Is SEVEN – The 411

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baby - seven eh

I am so freaking pissed I could cuss !  My beta this week? SEVEN !  Last week?  EIGHT !!  Week before that?  NINE !!  Ugh Ugh Ugh !!!

Why me Lord?  Why me???   I thought that by doing a D&C, things would return to normal after a month or so.  This is week SEVEN and my beta is SEVEN !  Okay, seven is my favorite number… means completion but I do not sense that right now.  I am angry.  I am pissed off.  I am mad as hell !   I want a ZERO beta so that I can move on with my life. 

No, I get a seven, off and on bleeding, dark brown gross spotting, and the wearing of thin pads, which I deplore !

I called my doctor’s office and asked the nurse if anything could be done to speed this up and of course, the answer is NO !  There is nothing they can prescribe to make this beta go down. I am so over this I do not know what to to !!

 

 

Beta Is STILL Not Zero – The 411

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baby - angry

To say that I am angry, pissed, mad, upset, beside myself-  that is pretty accurate at this point !

On Tuesday, I had an appointment with my Internist, Dr. Witt, and had him to run a complete HLA panel and several other blood tests to detect autoimmune issues.  We are running the panel of tests that Dr. Braverman runs.  It is just as an additional precaution. It was very alarming and hurtful to receive results from PGD that reveal that your fetus was genetically and pathologically normal.  It leaves more questions than answers, considering I was on an autoimmune protocol with my cycle.

My beta was also tested and it is EIGHT !  UGH UGH UGH !!  I am approaching week 7 here and I am ready to get this show on the road !  I am experiencing bleeding and clots off and on.  I wish my period would just come on already.  My menses are normally only 2 days or so.  Not this off and on crap.  That is the one reason I always wanted a c-section, to avoid vaginal discharge, then I found out that even with a c-section, the uterus is STILL going to discharge and expel all that goook… SURROGATE ANYONE?  lol.   Okay… I am back.  I am ready willing and able to do this…. hopefully only ONE time !  I want twins and DONE !

I am so disappointed that my beta is not zero.  It is driving me nuts !  I have been all over Dr. Google looking for ways to lower the beta, and the only thing you can do is eat liver healthy foods and drink a ton of water.  I am sooooo irritated !  I digress….Will keep you updated as I go.

And The Cramping Begins- The 411

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baby- menstrual cramps

Thursday afternoon, I started experience CRAMPS !  Like the ones that hurt so bad it feels like little monsters are inside TWISTING THE CRAP out of your ovaries !  Yep… those !  I had a little light spotting and this continued until Friday night.  This morning, MY BIRTHDAY, of all days, nothing !

I called CNY Fertility Center and Spa and spoke with my nurse to inquire about this extremely light spotting and I was concerned about doing a baseline since it stopped.  Low and behold, that was NOT my period.  UGH !  I learned that my beta is dropping to levels where my body realizes that it is not pregnant so my period, a full flow, is looming.

On one hand I was relieved because now I have a little breather to get the rest of my meds and a little time to wrap my head around going through this next IVF cycle.  The first one was a breeze.  I was a ball of emotions, but it was easy after I go the hang of the injections.  Women have warned that every cycle is different. 

I am kinda excited about this cycle because it means I could actually get pregnant with the twins I so desperately want, and on the other hand, it could mean a BFN or another loss.  All I can do is try to stay positive and know that God is in control and I have to trust Him no matter what.  I have to believe that this will happen in Kyros, not Cronos. 

Patiently waiting for my menses, which, if those deadly cramps were any indication, are going to be HELL ! 

 

 

Genetic Results & Beta Is STILL Not Zero !! – The 411

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baby - beta hcg

Okay, now I am trying not to be too pissed off.  This entire process is so difficult and taxing on one’s nerves.  It is like trying to get to finish line… you can see it, but you still have a few yards to go to cross it !

I had blood drawn yesterday for beta hcg.  My beta was 29 last week and this week…. 19 !  UGH UGH UGH !  Why is it not ZERO?  Next week it will probably be just 9…. I am ready for it to drop to 0 so I can get started on my next cycle before it interferes with my plans for my premiere.  God forbid it doesn’t drop in the next 2 wks.  My film premiere is on August 16th and I can not be in DC and in Albany at the same time and I am not trying to do the commute back and forth in the middle of this premiere !   I guess the term “it is what it is” is applicable here…

In other news, I FINALLY got my genetic test results back on the baby I lost.  Just as I suspected, it was a GIRL !! Oddly enough, she was perfectly fine.

– No genetic abnormalities

– No trisomys

– No downs syndrome

– No translocations

– NO NOTHING !

I spoke with Dr. Grossman this morning to get his take and he says that it could be genetic and just below the level of detection for the testing they are able to perform.  It could also possibly be autoimmune and that testing and treatment for autoimmune issues has not been shown to make a difference in the outcome.  What can be done is giving low dose blood thinners, anti-inflammatory steroids to suppress the immune system, and low dose asprin, all of which I was already on this past cycle- and hope the outcome is different with the next cycle. I did ask him if neupogen wash and or injections being added to the protocol would help.

It is so disappointing and such a helpless feeling to not have answers and then having to just GUESS at a protocol and HOPE for the best.  I do not think I can do more praying that I did and have been doing thru out this whole ordeal.

This is truly in the hands of God !

My PGD Results (genetic testing) on My Embryo Are In- The 411

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baby- genetic testing

Today, I called Lenox Hill Hospital and spoke to the genetics lab. They have been bs’n my OB for weeks about my results, promising to send then by weeks end for the past 4 weeks.  Well, as on Thursday when they were not there, I was PISSED !  I called first thing this am and reamed them out !  How DARE they make a woman who lost a baby unexpectedly WAIT SIX weeks for results that should have been completed within TWO !  They lady made a few calls and learned the lab report had been compiled and will be send to Dr. Karamitsos ASAP.

Dr. K called me this afternoon and just as I suspected IT WAS A GIRL !!! What is heartbreaking and relief at the same time is that the was NOTHING wrong with my baby !!  No trisomy… no translocations… no downs… NOTHING !  She was normal…  WHAT?   Then what happened?  My RE initially thought that it was an autoimmune issue.  I was already doing intralipid infusions and prednisone to counter autoimmune issues.

I sent a message to my RE at CNY Fertility Center and Spa to get his input on my next cycle so that we will not have a repeat of last cycle.  I want THE most aggressive autoimmune treatment they can give me.

Today, I went in for my beta and am hoping it has dropped to 0 and my period will start soon so I can get this show in the road !!

Gearing Up For IVF #2 – THE 411

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baby- IVF 2 meds

So, I started ordering my meds for IVF#2.  I am ordering them in a few shipments so that my purse will not start screaming at me all at one time !  I, stupidly donated my meds to people after I got my BFP.  Although it helped other women, now I have to purchase some of those expensive meds all over again and I am out-of-pocket.  It is truly worth the expense.  I will just take one vacation less this year.  I planned to go somewhere tropical this summer…  With two film premieres, one in DC and the other in LA in a few months, I have to watch my spending.  I am doing these red carpet, celeb hosted premieres out of my own pocket and any money raised thru ticket sales, raffles and donations, I am donating to two recovery centers for persons struggling with addiction.  My film is about addiction and recovery.

I am so ready for my period to start so that I can start stimming, but at the same time, I am glad my body is taking its sweet time so that it will completely heal.  I am really pissed that I am not having a Christmas baby and that if this next IVF takes, my babies will be born in May.  I did not want a May birthday !  My nephew was born in May and the family has birthdays in every month except December and January…  I guess some things we just can not control.  My body has truly pissed me OFF !  Then I dial it back and remember that God is in control of all of this and He knows so much more than I what the future holds and if he took those babies, my three embryos that I transferred, there was something going on that I could not see.  I know what I asked Him for regarding my children and I know that what I asked Him for, He will give me !

So if it is Spring and Summer babies He wants for me, who am I to argue or complain?

I am also distressed because I have gained about 18-20 pounds with the ivf treatments, despite the fact that I walked 3-6 miles everyday and ate mostly veggies !  I have dropped 12 of the pounds but the fat that remains is in the most awful places… my THIGHS and my BREASTS !  UGH !!!  I can not wait to have babies so I go under the knife and correct these atrocities… yes, I am that vain.  I want my body back!  Another thing men will never have to deal with, LOL.

Happy Fourth of July !!

 

 

BETA STILL NOT ZERO – THE 411

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baby- blood work

 

 

UGH UGH UGH !!!!!  I have been going in for beta draws every single week.  I went from 9500+ to 895 to 151 to now 29!  Um… can we get to zero already?

As soon as my beta drops to zero, my menses should begin and I will go in for baseline and will be able to start stimming for my next cycle.

I have already started ordering my meds in small quantities so my purse will not go into shock again !  I did find a site, http://www.freegaragesale.com, where you can buy meds from women who had left over meds or cancelled cycles.  You just have to have them ship it Fedex COD, open the box to verify contents and check expiration dates, etc and then hand over the money to Fedex.

I got my Menopur from there for only $150 per box, instead of $398 per box !  Woot Woot !

I go back on Tuesday for my next beta and hopefully it will be zero.  That will be five weeks since my procedure, so within another two weeks, I should be at zero… I hope !