Tag Archives: IVF

Happy New Year 2024 !!

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I am wishing you all a Happy New Year 🎊🎊🍾🍾

2023 was a stressful year, full of hurt, disappointment, illness, death, struggle, and ineffectiveness. Despite all of it, I am grateful that I overcame it all.

Being a caregiver to my Mother, who now has cancer for the forth time, has been soul shattering. I felt trapped and unappreciated. My mother was experiencing a type of dementia due to the meds she had to take. A few months ago, the meds stopped working ! Her oncologist immediately changed protocols. The new protocol is working on shrinking the two tumors in her liver and destroyed the nodule in her lungs.

I am embracing 2024 as my year of triump. I am focused on winning and will NOT allow anything nor anyone to distract me.

My daughter is now 7. She is the most amazing gift 🎁. She is thriving and so intelligent. This child is so much different than we were as kids. She is almost like a little adult, the way she processes things. She is very compassionate and sensitive.

I look forward to exploring the world 🌎 with her this year. We are researching and trying to select a country to expat. I am over the US. I need a change and I am determined to ensure that my child cultured and educated. She loves learning and exploring. She has more stamps in her passport that most adults. She loves going on ‘Holiday’…

I am looking forward to preparing for a move and being able to spend half the year abroad every year and prepare to purchase a home in another country.

2024 is going to be epic !

It has already delivered bad news. We arrived at the beach and got settled into the condo and went down the hall to let CGB’s honorary Grandparents know that we arrived safely and learned that her Grandmother passed away unexpectedly two days before Christmas ! We would have expected for her Grandfather to pass, as he too has cancer, but it’s on his nose. He is 101 years old. It was heartbreaking 💔. He didn’t even recognize us. A nurse /caregiver opened the door, which was strange because we were expecting Rose Marie to open the door. She fell a fee months ago and broke her shoulder. She didn’t tell us about that and we knew that Armand had fallen. She got a UTI and bed sores in the facility she was in so her brothers hired a private duty nurse and had her moved back to their condo. The nurse told me that she was skin and bones, although she was always tiny, she was withering away. The nurse was fattening her up, and she seemed to be improving and was doing a lot better. Two days before Christmas, she took ill and was hospitalized and passed away 18 hrs later with Armand and the nurse by her side. My daughter was hurt and could not understand why Armand didn’t know her

I brought them so Lemoncello that I made, which they Love. He smiled when the nurse told him that we brought Lemoncello. She told me that he had had a very bad day was way off, which was unusual for him. He is normally very sharp and aware. A few weeks ago, he and Rose Marie were super excited that we were coming to visit and staying for at least a month. I was looking forward to cooking some of their favorites and spoiling them.

Despite this sad news, I refuse to get sidetracked. I am determined to be productive and make this happen for my family.

I pray that you all have a productive, successful, healthy, and abundant new year.

Until next time,

V

Update…The 411

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Hi All !

Life is a whirlwind and we sometimes lose time by being so busy with other things.

This past year has been challenging. My brother in law and several friends passed away unexpectedly. My grandmother passed away at the age of 90 a few months ago.

I decided to take Salsa dance classes and brought covid to our doorstep and although my mom and I bounced back in 2 days, my baby and her teacher got really sick with horrid symptoms for over a week. A few weeks after recovery, my baby girl started struggling with fluency issues. The ER doctor tried to shoo it away as nothing but viral response but I know my child. A week later, she started full out stuttering while we were in San Francisco with the whole family. When we returned, I found a speech pathologist and had an evaluation done and we started her therapy sessions. I wasn’t aware that covid related fluency disorder was a thing until I talked to my sister, who is a Pediatric RN. We are very blessed that the disorder is improving as quickly as it appeared. We will still do the weekly speech therapy, as it can hurt, but I am so relieved that it started reversing on its own.

My mother’s health is still seemingly declining. The geriatric depression doesn’t help matters. She is resigned to being old and embracing all the accoutrements therein. I push her to push past how she feels, get up and move and build muscles and stamina. If it were up to her, she would like to sit on an electric scooter or wheelchair and allow her muscles to atrophy. It is completely mentally exhausting being around someone who wants to act like they are 90 with one foot in the grave, when you know they are not. The mental decline. The physical decline… watching your parents morph into old age is not fun. It’s draining. It’s all encompassing.

My daughter is doing really well with school. We hired a private teacher who comes to our home and baby girl completed Kindergarten in 5 months and quickly moved to the 1st grade. She is self paced and is moving a remarkable speed. She is making all A’s and loves learning. She loves science and math and anything STEAM/STEM.

Our family is excited for my nephew who just graduated from college and signed a contract to play professional basketball in the Euro League. It is bittersweet that his father passed away and didn’t get to see all their hard work come to fruition.

Tomorrow, we are traveling to NC for his going away dinner. My baby girl is excited to go visit her cousins. They FaceTime almost daily.

I have given serious thought to adopting a biracial infant or toddler or starting a search once again for a surrogate, but it is difficult as a single woman to adopt. We looked at foster care but for the most part, they are interested in sending the children back to their families and I don’t want that heartbreak for my daughter or self. Looks like it will be just the two of us and I could not have been given a more perfect little one ❤️.

2019/2020 Companies Which Cover Fertility Treatments – The 411

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Nike
Live nation
Wayfair
Hilton – needs to be a corporate location
Bank of America – unlimited
Spectrum
Michael kors
Adidas
Nestle – 25k closest outlets
American Airlines
Pepsi co- 35k
American eagle
Dicks
ASPCA
Uline
Target – after 1 year work a min of 28hrs
Breakthru beverage
PayPal
Monster
Expedia
Citi- Tampa 24k 7500k day 1 ft
Capital one 60k
Wells Fargo 60k
Toyota
Ups
Costco
Ford – corporate only not dealerships
Academy sports
Under armor- 3cycles /30 days after employment
Walgreens 15k 10k meds or 30k 20k meds
30hr week. 60 days after employment
Quicken loans
Staples
Comcast
Fed ex
Xfinity
Kohl’s
Nike -y 25k 10k meds
Amazon FT, 10 % oop 1 cycle, 2 if no live birth
Chase 30k, 10k
American Express 25k 10k
Duke energy 25k
5th 3rd Bank 2 rounds benefits 30 days from Employment
Spectrum 10k
Comcast – 2 retrieval’s 2 transfers 12 weeks maternity at 💯
Cocoa cola- 25k
Fidelity 30k
Cvs 10
Sprint 10
Gap-20k
Ally financial – 3 full cycles including meds
IKEA
Apple -20
Macy’s -33k
Petsmart
BNP -30k
Td bank -10
Anthem -10
Cigna -10
Barclays -30k
fresenius medical care -50k
Archer Daniels midland -40,10 ft day 1
Cisco – 50k
eBay – ?, Meds 5k, day 1
Anthem BCBS
Pershing LLC/ BNY mellon -20k,10k
REI inc -3 rounds part and full time Day 1
James Lang la sale -20k + 5kmeds, FT, day 1
United health care or optum 15,10
L brands 10k
W.L. Gore and associates 25k
Disney-11k
Pyramid hotel group – unlimited
Morgan Stanley 15k. 30k
Wellsfargo 25,10
J.P. Morgan 30k
Master card 30k
Metlife
Red Bull 1 round
Td bank 25k
Exxon mobile 3 rounds
Prudential 20
Geico 25
Time Warner cable
Avid technology – 25k
Morgan Stanley
Edward Jones 15k
Geico 25k
Farmers ins 10k ft
Symantec -2 rounds
Humana – 10k no meds
IStarbucks -15k 5k pt 20hrs week
Convergys- 20k work from home
Hertz – 2 positions (25k 10k meds, day 1 )
Bank of America
Verizon -20k
T-Mobile – 25k
Bio life -25k 20hrs week
Aldi ft –
Hilton – needs to be corporate
Jc penny -25k, 10k, FT, day 1

Twenty Weeks Post Partum – The 411

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My angel is now 20 weeks old !  

She is growing by leaps and bounds and is growing super long.  She now weighs almost 16 pounds.

She can sit up with assistance for a little while before falling forward. 

She hates to sit down or lie down. She now prefers to sit up and stand up.  

A friend sent her an Amazon gift card for her christening so we ordered her a Fisher Price Jumperoo. I am still trying to put it together.  I deplore reading instructions and putting things together. Hopefully I will figure out how to get this seat part together this weekend before calling in the calvary lol.

I am completely and head over heels in love with my daughter !  She is the culmination of every dream I have ever had of a child.  

I soooo want to give her a sibling. I have been very depressed about that lately.   Because of the emergency hysterectomy,  I can not carry another baby. I am blessed to have four eggs on ice so that once I find a willing surrogate, my little girl can have a sibling.   I worry about leaving her in the world alone.  I want her to have a sibling that she is close to and to experience having a life growing up fighting and loving a sibling.   There is nothing like it !

I can’t believe that in a few short days, my baby will be five months old !  I am starting to plan her 1st birthday event.  I am doing a safari theme and am looking at trip packages to either Tampa Busche Gardens Africa or to Disney’s Animal Kingdom.   I am hoping my family will be able to go, but if not, it will be just us.

I ask that you all keep my mom in your prayers.  Not only has a knot formed under her breast that she just had surgery on (hoping its just scar tissue) but her anemia seems to be caused by something other than iron deficiency.   The doctor has ordered a colonoscopy and referred her to a Gastroenterologist for further review.  She is nauseated all the time and has been for quite some time.   The doctor assumed is was reflux.  Now I am scared to death, that given how much she sleeps and the fact that even with nausea medications are not very effective, that we are dealing with something far more serious. It is my prayer that God could not and would not be that cruel to allow her to be sick again.  There is only so much the human body can withstand.   Now that she is retired, I want her to be able to travel and enjoy her life and not have it marred by illness and fear of illness. 

Until next week….

Eleven Weeks Post Partum – The 411

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It has been 11 weeks since we welcomed Baby Girl into the world !

She is fat, fluffy, and such a delight. She can now hold her head up and keep it in line with her body when  being held upright.   She turns her head to look for me when she hears my voice.  She loves tummy time and at long last she enjoys her bath.

At current, she still averages 3 to 4 ounces of milk at a time. She drinks 14-28 ounces in a given day but on average, she drinks about 22 ounces a day.

The baby is laughing out loud now and coos when you talk to her and flashes the biggest smile.

I am beyond in love with her and am excited to spend Christmas with her.

Mommy News:

I am down 64 pounds since giving birth and will continue to work on my body.  I plan to walk a few miles a day on the beach and continue with a low carb high protein high fat diet.   

The feeling around my incision is starting to come back and it feels weird.

My milk supply has dropped quite a bit since the clogged ducts.  I have pumped only 10 oz the last several days.   I’m not going to stress about it.  She has been sleeping a lot over the past week and has been drinking about 14 oz total so she is still getting more breast milk than organic formula.  We are in DC for the holiday and I will spend more time trying to pump every other hour when we get back to try to get the supply up.   I also started taking the motilium again now that the clogged ducts are gone.

Grandmom News:

My mother is doing well.  Her wound is almost closed now !  Other than nausea, she feels pretty good.

Thirty-Six Weeks & Counting – The 411

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Two heads of romaine lettuce with dark background

How my baby’s growing

Your baby is still packing on the pounds – at the rate of about an ounce a day. She now weighs almost 6 pounds and is more than 18 1/2 inches long (about the length of a head of romaine lettuce). She’s shedding most of the downy covering of hair that covered her body, as well as the vernix caseosa, the waxy substance that covered and protected her skin during her nine-month amniotic bath. Your baby swallows both of these substances, along with other secretions, resulting in a blackish mixture called meconium that will form the contents of her first bowel movements.

At the end of this week, your baby will be considered “early term.” (Full term is 39 to 40 weeks. Babies born before 37 weeks are preterm, 41 weeks is late term, and those born after 42 are post-term.) Most likely your baby is already head-down. But if not, your doctor or midwife may suggest scheduling an external cephalic version. That’s a fancy way of saying that your healthcare provider will apply pressure to your abdomen to try to manipulate your baby into a head-down position.

How Mommy’s life’s changing

Now that your baby is taking up so much room, you may have trouble eating a normal-size meal. Smaller, more frequent meals are often easier to handle at this point. On the other hand, you may have less heartburn and have an easier time breathing when your baby starts to “drop” down into your pelvis. This process – called lightening – often happens a few weeks before labor if this is your first baby. (If you’ve given birth before, it probably won’t happen before labor starts.) If your baby drops, you may also feel increased pressure in your lower abdomen, which may make walking increasingly uncomfortable, and you’ll probably find that you have to pee even more frequently. If your baby is very low, you may feel lots of vaginal pressure and discomfort as well. Some women say it feels as though they’re carrying a bowling ball between their legs!

You might also notice that your Braxton Hicks contractions are more frequent now. Be sure to review the signs of labor with your doctor or midwife and find out when she wants to hear from you. As a general rule, if you’re full-term, your pregnancy is uncomplicated, and your water hasn’t broken, she’ll probably have you wait to come in until you’ve been having contractions that last for about a minute each, coming every five minutes for an hour. Of course, you’ll want to call right away if you notice a decrease in your baby’s activity or think you’re leaking amniotic fluid, or if you have any vaginal bleeding, fever, a severe or persistent headache, constant abdominal pain, or vision changes.

Even if you’re enjoying an uncomplicated pregnancy, it’s best to avoid flying (or any travel far from home) during your final month because you can go into labor at any time. In fact, some airlines won’t let women on board who are due to deliver within 30 days of the flight.

BABY STATS:

How Far Along?

36 weeks !

How Big Is The Little One?

The baby is the size of a head of romaine lettuce or a spaghetti squash.

Total Weight Gain / Loss?

Eeeeek !   I gained TEN pounds of fluid weight since my hospitalization last week !  I freaked OUT !    That is a total weight gain of 23 pounds !  I had only gained 13 pounds until last week.   I lost 27 pounds my first trimester so I am still under the weight I started at but I do NOT like this weight gain AT ALL !  I am certain that it will fall off after I deliver the baby and also with breast feeding.

Maternity Clothes?

I spend most of my day in either pjs or a body con dress.  I have absolutely NO desire to do anything but shower and put on fresh pjs since I can not really leave the house due to bed rest.  I have gone out a few times to pick up breakfast and just put a dress on on top of my pjs.

Sleep?

Because I am tending to my mom at night, I am not sleeping well.  I wake up because she is talking out of her head , she gets up, or if it is time for her medications.  I have been napping during the day somewhat. My baby is pretty active around 1 am too.

Best Moment of the Week?

I have had a pretty boring week !  My mom had surgery on Friday and I am on total bed rest so I have pretty much been on the sofa or in the bed watching tv, drinking fluids and chilling. I have a biophysical exam and sono in the morning in NYC.  I see the OB after that.  My OB is in Greece until Sunday so I am praying my baby does not try to come out before he is back !  I do the second hospital tour on Sunday in preparation for the birth.  I just pray they do not try to keep me after my appt tomorrow !  I am NOT ready and my mother can not travel four hours to NYC right now. She has her post op appointment tomorrow and gets her drains out.  There is very little drainage now, which is good.

Symptoms?

My legs and feet are so swollen that I look like Miss Piggy !  My toes in the left foot are numb most of the time.  I have an external hemorrhoid that has not gone down. My baby feels super heavy and I am having sharp pains shooting down into the vaginal area and I have problems getting comfy.  I have a definitive waddle when I walk and walking has become uncomfortable due to pressure.  I try to stay on the sofa with my feet up.

Food Cravings?

I have no cravings and really no appetite.  I have more room now for food now that the baby has dropped down a bit but I still am not hungry most of the time.  I have random periods where I am starving.  I will start to eat and get uber full quickly, thus I had eating out !

Food Aversions?

I just have no desire for food at all right now.  I am sitting here drinking lemonade and a protein shake.  I will likely eat apple cinnamon oatmeal for an afternoon snack.

Gender?

baby girl !

Labor Signs?

I hope not !  I have a lot of pressure, but that is just a 5 – 6 pound baby and tons of fluid.  I had contractions in the hospital after the transvaginal exam and a cervix check and I can say without a doubt, SHOOT ME !  Do NOT let me have ANY contractions at all.  That ish is for the BIRDS !

What I Miss?

Having normal size legs and feet !

What I Am Looking Forward To?

Giving birth to a healthy baby girl in short while !   The doctors have scheduled me cesarean and I am just hoping this baby stays put until then.  They have moved our time table up a whole two weeks ! EEEEEEEEk !

Bump?

I have a low basketball !

Navel In/Out?

In

Baby / Mommy Purchases?

The only think I bought this week other than receiving the Milk Snob car seat cover, was a foot bath and Dr. Teal’s foot soak with lavender.  I am sending my sister out to get the baby a preemie outfit to wear home in the event that she is as small as they say she is and her other clothing will not fit.

Thirty Five Weeks – The 411

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Whole honeydew melon with stem in green bowl on green table

How my baby’s growing

The baby doesn’t have much room to maneuver now that she’s over 18 inches long and tips the scales at 5 1/4 pounds (about the size of a honeydew melon). Because it’s so snug in your womb, she isn’t likely to be doing somersaults anymore, but the number of times she kicks should remain about the same. Her kidneys are fully developed now, and her liver can process some waste products. Most of her basic physical development is now complete. She’ll spend the next few weeks putting on weight.

How Mommy’s life’s changing

Your uterus – which was entirely tucked away inside your pelvis when you conceived – now reaches up under your rib cage. If you could peek inside your womb, you’d see that there’s more baby than amniotic fluid in there now. Your ballooning uterus is crowding your other internal organs, too, which is why you probably have to pee more often and may be dealing with heartburn and other gastrointestinal distress. If you’re not grappling with these annoyances, you’re one of the lucky few.

From here on out, you’ll start seeing your doctor or midwife every week. Sometime between now and 37 weeks, she’ll do a vaginal and rectal culture to check for bacterium called group B streptococcum (GBS). (Don’t worry – the swab is the size of a regular cotton swab, and it won’t hurt.) GBS is usually harmless in adults, but if you have it and pass it on to your baby during birth, it can cause serious complications, such as pneumonia, meningitis, or a blood infection. Because 10 to 30 percent of pregnant women have the bacteria and don’t know it, it’s vital to be screened. (The bacteria come and go on their own – that’s why you weren’t screened earlier in pregnancy.) If you’re a GBS carrier, you’ll get IV antibiotics during labor, which will greatly reduce your baby’s risk of infection.

This is also a good time to create a birth plan. Using our form will help you focus on specifics – like who’ll be present, what pain management techniques you want to try, and where you want your baby to stay after you deliver. It will give you a starting point to discuss your preferences with your medical team. Childbirth is unpredictable, and chances are you won’t follow your plan to the letter, but thinking about your choices ahead of time – and sharing your preferences with your doctor or midwife – should take some of the anxiety out of the process.

Learn about: Arriving at the hospital

How can I prepare for my arrival at the hospital?

Long before you go into labor, you and your partner should map out the most direct route to the hospital or birth center. Find out where to park, keeping in mind that you’ll be leaving your car for at least 24 hours. Ask the hospital staff where you should enter if you arrive after-hours. Most hospitals offer tours of the obstetrical floor at designated times. Taking advantage of these tours will give you a chance to do a dry run before the big day.

BABY STATS:

How Far Along?

35 weeks !

How Big Is The Little One?

My baby is the size of a honeydew melon and she weighs 4lb 3 oz

Total Weight Gain / Loss?

Although I lost 27 pounds my first trimester, I have only gained a total of 13 pounds. Since I was in the hospital for two days and given 3-4 bags of fluids, I can not do an accurate weight reading this week.

Maternity Clothes?

I am wearing the same maternity clothing:  jeans, capris, oversized tees, maternity tees, body con dresses, sundresses, and a few of my baggy dresses from pre-pregnancy.

Sleep?

I have been sleeping well.  It was hard to sleep the two days I was in the hospital because of the monitors and the unfamiliar noises.

Best Moment of the Week?

The best moment I had this week was the relief of knowing the bleeding was not an issue of my baby and that the baby and I both were fine and also hearing of the excitement of the little gifts I sent to my sister-friend’s children.  One child has been sick and the older toddler helped to care for the other.  I was so tickled to hear how much they enjoyed the little tokens.   Now I am gearing up for my mother’s reconstructive surgery tomorrow.  She will be in the hospital for a few days.  I am just praying all remains stable with me and my little munchkin and that my mom’s surgery goes smoothly.

Symptoms?

I have an external hemorrhoid which has not gone back down.  Some mornings, I awake a bit queasy and my skin is often overly sensitive and itchy. I take children’s liquid Benedryl and it helps tremendously.  This week, I seem to be burping a lot.

Food Cravings?

I still have no appetite so I do not crave anything in particular.

Food Aversions?

None

Gender?

Girl !,

Labor Signs?

I experienced contractions after a vaginal exam in the hospital.  They discovered that I was very dehydrated and after 2 bags of fluids, the contractions stopped.

What I Miss?

Nothing at the moment except being at the beach.

What I Am Looking Forward To?

Seeing my baby and holding her.

Bump?

My little soccer ball is still nice and round.

Navel In/Out?

In

Baby Purchases?

This week, my baby’s 4Moms Breeze Play yard in Grey arrived at Target.  I had giftcards from my shower and Sunday was Run Target day with 10% off, coupled with my 15% off completion coupon, I ordered the play yard so that I could maximize the discounts on the $300 large ticket item. I ended up getting $90 off ! I also ordered a Milk Snob carseat cover to match the baby’s Kate Spade baby bag.

Home & Total Bedrest – The 411

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This morning, all the labs were in and everything was normal.  The placenta is in tact and the blood flow from Mommy to baby is perfect.

They think I had a vaginal blood vessel rupture.  I wondered if I had an SCH, but no one could answer.  

The contractions were due to dehydration.  After 3 bags of fluids, they stopped.

My mom stayed overnight with me in the hospital and my sister came by after work.   

At 7pm they allowed me to eat I ate some of the Kabob platter my mom had and then ordered grilled cheese and soup for dinner last night.

This morning at 9 am, we were discharged and I called the HD LIVE sonogram place I initially had an appointment at and was able to get my appointment back.  I figured I would get it done before going on complete bedrest, which I am required to remain on until delivery, sans doc appointments.

Thanks for all the prayers and we’ll wishes !