For three weeks, I had to take 2 mg of Estrace twice a day and during the last week, I had to do the Endometrin progesterone support vaginally.  I fully expected to be a hormonal mess, but I felt no different.  The last five days, I have had to add in 10 units per day of Lupron injections.  The insomnia started almost immediately.

I finished the Estrace and Endometrin doses and am now awaiting my period to start so that I can go in for a baseline and get instructions to start stimming.  My period should start on October 9th or 10th.

In the middle of this next cycle, my mother will be having surgery to remove the remaining breast tissue and cancer from her right breast on October 15th. She will start radiation and possibly chemotherapy within six weeks of the surgery.  After she completes treatment, she will go back in for surgery to have a tummy tuck so they can remove enough skin to make the flap for her breast, insert a temporary implant, and then in another surgery, they will put in two new implants and reduce and lift the left breast.  So now she will have a flat tummy and perky boos !  I told her I am officially hating ! lol

My mom is very tired but she has all this nervous energy.  She has rearranged her closets, sorted clothing to donate, rearranged her sewing studio, and re-did the stuff in the kitchen cabinets.  Oh… and she rearranged and organized the garage !  She has WAY too much nervous energy.

In regards to my mom’s cancer diagnosis, I have been a bit reflective and very nervous.  There are never any guarantees in life and anything could go wrong.  I fear getting pregnant and having babies and she not being around to get to know then and for them to get to know her.  I worry about meeting Mr. Right and her not being there to walk me down the aisle.  My father and grandfather have been gone 14 years and 9 years respectively.  So many thoughts rush into one’s mind when faced with mortality.  There is this quiet voice that keeps saying all will be well.  I have to trust that and focus on staying calm through this cycle and being supportive of my mom.

My sisters and I are planning a tea for her the weekend before her surgery.  We started this tradition of doing a tea when she had breast cancer 8 years ago and we started a foundation called Tea For 2 Foundation to educate and support persons affected by breast cancer.

With everything going on, I am looking forward to going on a short trip this weekend!

I am still trying to learn the ropes for EHarmony.com.  That website is so confusing.  I get a little ticked that they keep sending me matches that are 5 ft 6 or 5 ft 8…. I AM 5’11 and I wear ridiculous heels !  Once I am more familiar with the site, it may go a bit easier.  With Match.com, I am chatting with a few guys.  I will make an effort to go out on a few meet and greets next week when I get back.  This is all so nerve wrecking.  A few guys have asked me for my number, but I do not feel comfortable giving out my number just yet.  It is so hard to get rid of people once they have your phone number.  At least my phone has the block feature, but that will not work if they call from other numbers !  UGH.  I guess I need to loosen up a bit, but I swear I do not want to meet Chester the Molester and then have to change my phone number.  Maybe a burner phone will work?